Left-Handed Pinky...

Sometimes I get a creative idea in my head and I must execute it immediately! And such is the case with a recent painting of mine... featuring this adorable little girl I named Pinky.  You see... I wanted to loosen up my style a bit and so I decided to do an entire painting left-handed! I wanted a real folk art feel, so I took several approaches for this personal assignment...

Starting with my usual techniques, I began to create lots and lots of layers. Lots! It's actually pretty funny (and a little scary!) to see where the face begins in this process. It actually looks like a psychopathic fluorescent baby panda, right?

Ahhhhh... a little better with more layers, but still kind of scary without the eyeballs! But I knew in my head where the piece was going, so I let myself trust the process and let it unfold with my non-dominant hand.

For this painting, I used a very, very, very dry brush for all of the strokes. After I put the paint on the brush, I wiped it almost completely dry onto a paper towel. When I changed colors, I didn't re-use that wet brush... I used another dry brush.

It took a long time and required much patience, especially doing it awkwardly left-handed... but the effect was worth it. Lots and lots of yummy layers of colors that highlighted the paintstrokes beneath.

Layers covered. Layers uncovered. Adding more over top. It really was a deliciously delightful process!

The last thing I did was add the polka dots to the background... because I'm an ass-backwards kind of gal... and because I thought it needed a little something subtle. But when I stepped back... I fell in love with her immediately! She was everything I had hoped for in my mind, before I started to paint. And when that actually happens — besides being a miracle in and of itself — I start to believe in myself as an artist. I start to believe that maybe I really can make the things that I see in my head. And I start to want to create more things because I trust myself.

Now that's one left-handed compliment!

Starting From Scratch...

And then the right brain said to the left hand... I love you more!

Who knew that what started as an artistic exercise in letting go and getting in touch with my childlike self... would lead me to realize so much about what's going on in my subconscious! In practicing mark-making, scribbling and symbol drawing for Mindy Lacefield's Paint Your Story workshop, she encouraged us to use our non-dominant hand (mine's the left) for some of the time. And when I did... oh boy... I fell in love! In fact, I loved my drawings so much more that I did with my left hand that I found myself saying...

...don't practice too much Lefty, we don't want you to start drawing like Righty!

And then I had an epiphany. Why was I being so nice to my left hand who was drawing all crooked and off kilter like a child? And the things I was saying to my left hand kind of felt like I was talking to a child...

It's okay to make mistakes.... you're just starting out. Don't get all wrapped up in the outcome... just enjoy the process. Don't worry if you don't like what you make, we'll just make another one.

But on the other hand (literally!), what have I been saying to my right hand for all these years? Well, it turned out to be things like this...

You suck. You're not good enough. You'll never be good enough. You might as well give up now because you're not capable. You can keep trying, but you're not going to get it right... no matter how hard you try!

Well, how awful is that? I mean... you wouldn't talk to a child that way, would you? Of course not! So I decided to make some changes. I'm going to take a left-handed approach in the way I talk to myself. I'm going to be kinder to myself. I'm going to pretend I'm talking to that enthusiastic young girl in me who doesn't know how to give up yet. The one who might need a little gentle encouragement. And I'm going to be really nice to her. And if I forget... well... I'll just put that pencil in my left hand and start from scratch.